Advice for Careers and Romance

Can your career stand the chance of an office affair?

© Paym Bergson

While Hollywood and TV have dramatized the "wonderful" time within the office, reality says that most often Career and Office flings get flung.

There must be a full moon out - I have been receiving some strange (well, strange to me) emails and questions for Career Advice. This week I'm posting my responses. Most of these questions concern how to handle romance with Career - Office Affairs, flings while working your way up the ladder, whatever other cliche you might call it. Somehow, Success with Career and Office Romance seems a bit, well, Hollywoodish. Here goes:

DISCLAIMER - Please note - I do not intend for any of this to be taken as professional advice - just my own two cents worth, as readers took the time to ask.

Dear CA - what are the official rules for handling a hot romance at the office?

RULES??? There are none - other than you'd better make sure most of your co-workers don't get annoyed and that it does NOT interfere with your performance - on your work, I mean.

To be blunt - it is better NOT to have an office romance - as at least one person is most likely to be fired or told to quit - especially if both parties are not single. But as we do not live in a perfect world - just keep it quiet and don't share stories and gossip about your latest date with others at the office.

Dear CA - I really like a co-worker in my office, and I am sure she likes me - we do flirt at office parties and such - how do I get the nerve to ask her out?

Flirting at office parties is not a good indication of "like" - however, if you really want to pursue this, first read the answer to the above question. Then, if you still want to proceed, suggest perhaps going on your coffee break together, or even lunch. See her reaction - and if she does go, you can see how she acts with you. Proceed cautiously - you both still need your jobs.

Ok readers - back to you - your comments? Stories? Complaints? These are just a sample of what I have received recently.

________________________________________________________________________

Copyright September 14, 2006. Paym Bergson and Suite 101. All rights reserved.


The copyright of the article Advice for Careers and Romance in Career Advice is owned by Paym Bergson. Permission to republish Advice for Careers and Romance must be granted by the author in writing.



Comments
Sep 21, 2006 3:20 PM
Jo Murphy :
I don't even consider work flings.
I am not sure I would marry a teacher though they work too hard and they are never home.
Jo
Sep 22, 2006 10:01 AM
Paym Bergson :
LOL - thx for posting, Jo! (my hubby chuckled when I pointed out your post, as I'm the educator in the family!)

-Paym
Sep 23, 2006 1:12 PM
Irene Taylor :
Hi Jo and Paym,

Yes, an "office" romance can be hot stuff - but my story is a good example of how to handle one the right way (I hope!) My husband and I met at our teaching jobs - we taught at the same school for several years before we became romantically involved - then carried on a discreet romance for about a year before we ran-off one summer and got married. LOL!

Then we taught there together as husband and wife for about 15 years before retiring. The kids really loved it, and we were always careful not to let our personal lives influence our professional ones!

It did give us a lot of common ground since we knew the same children and families, but sometimes we needed to make the "no school talk after dinner" rule or we'd have probably both gone crazy!

I don't know about other office romances, but ours worked out fine! :)

Irene
Sep 23, 2006 2:03 PM
Jo Murphy :
Yes there is a young woman here who is dead keen on a Dad and I can't see anything wrong with a teacher marrying a single parent of a child too. I think that if handled dicreetly and with tact.

I just know that I don't want to get risky unless the relationship really looks like it could be agood one.

Having said that I sure have seen things go wrong for some,
Jo
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